The 1991 movie “What About Bob?” depicts a neurotic, obsessive-compulsive man who latches onto his therapist. In desperation, after countless pleading phone calls, Bob cunningly tracks down this therapist, who thought he’d escaped on a peaceful family vacation. As the therapist tries to shake off his clingy, high-maintenance patient, Bob begs, “Gimme! Gimme! I need! I need!” It’s a humorous scene with Bob believing he cannot live one more hour without a counseling session.
In reality, our “needs” list is quite short. Basically, humans need food, clothing and shelter. More specifically, we need adequate nutrition, clean water, air, exercise, and sleep to physically stay alive and healthy. We have mental, emotional, and spiritual needs as well–some of which are more easily met than others.
But God sees all our needs and longs to fulfill them, often through other people. But He wants us to trust Him. Often, focusing on our needs leads to comparison, self-pity, anxiety, fear, or anger.
A better option is to focus on the One who can meet them.
Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. (Matthew 6:31-33).
If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him (Matthew 7:11).
Remarkably, in His great love, God often goes far beyond simply meeting our basic needs. He may fulfill our social or emotional desires and even seemingly trivial physical matters. I’m not advocating selfishness, greed, or materialism, and I don’t believe God spoils us. But He perceives desires in our hearts and finds joy in fulfilling them! And if received with gratitude, this deepens our love for Him and increases our desire to please Him.
Delight yourself in the Lord; And He will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4).
Yet we have another need that often gets overlooked. Because we are created in God’s image, some of our greatest joys in life come from helping others fulfill their desires–being useful, assisting others, serving one another, giving. This need can only be met by taking our eye off of ourselves and looking to the needs of others. It requires humility and selflessness, as well as supernatural mental and emotional strength at times.
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed (2 Corinthians 9:8).
Demonstrating love in this manner imparts to us the sense of purpose, peace, and joy we need to truly live. God causes us to benefit from these good works as well. As Christ taught, “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35).
Beautiful, Carrie! Having experienced my own brand of “neediness” for years, I can vouch for looking to the Lord to meet them, NOT other people! And, unbeknownst to me, He had been meeting them all along – I just had not recognized the fact. When the scales fall off our eyes, we see so much more than our immediate, physical circumstances. It took a miracle…and a faithful, spirit-led Christian counselor – to get me back on the right path.
Thanks, Kathy! Your journey is an inspiration to me every time I think about it. I’m so happy for your new perspective!