I recently finished tossing files related to an art business I owned years ago. My oldest son sometimes assisted me back then. I recall a time he and I were returning very late at night from an art show deep in the Rocky Mountains. Exhausted from selling all weekend (then hours of tear-down and packing at its close), I’d started the van down two hundred twenty-four miles of winding mountain roads in the dark. As I struggled to stay awake ninety minutes from home, my sixteen-year-old son asked, “Hey Dad—want me to drive?” I responded without even thinking, “No, I’m fine.”
Within the half hour, my rear view mirror suddenly flashed with red and blue lights. I pulled over. The officer approached my window with a flashlight, commenting on my weaving across the lane line. I sheepishly explained my fatigue, and promised to let my son take the wheel. He agreed that would be a good idea. Fortunately I didn’t have to get out and walk a line or use a breathalyzer!
Same dad with a different son, just a few years ago: we were helping someone move, and I was precariously perched atop boxes, expertly packing the back of the moving truck. I’d been feverishly doing this for hours, and my adult son, who’d been handing me things, kindly asked if I wanted him to take over and give me a break. My muscles were tight and I was tired and sore. So what did I say? “Oh, no, I’m fine.” Within 30 minutes my body made me stop and I struggled to find a chair. My back had suddenly spasmed and I was in great pain. It took me about three weeks to recover!
Why is it we are so unwilling to ask for (or accept offers of) help?
You can ask God what your excuse is, but for me, I think it’s pride. Stubborn determination drives me to finish what I start, even if it kills me. Sometimes I imagine I’m the only one who can do it right. Other times, I tell myself I shouldn’t impose. (Perhaps in such cases I believe I’m not worth helping.) Or maybe I don’t want to feel indebted should someone do me a favor. And I certainly don’t want to be seen as weak or lazy!
We know from the Bible we should avoid pride and choose humility. It takes humility to accept someone’s help. But did you consider what helping you might do for them? Besides biblical encouragement on the topic, study after study demonstrates the mental, emotional, and physical benefits of doing something for others. So when you next need help, accept it—don’t deny others the blessing of helping! (You may even save yourself or others harm in the process.) And when you can help someone else, bless them and be blessed at the same time!
Further reading: Exodus 18:14-23, Proverbs 11:2 & 12:25, Matthew 7:7, James 4:6, Galatians 6:2 &10, Philippians 2:4.
